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BOSS: Hi Aradhye, welcome to the new team!

AA: Hello sir, great to join your awesomax team!

B: eek bad news sabse pehele!!  Yaar ye corona to ab khatam ho gaya hai, hum log office shuru kar rahe hain next month se. 

AA: That’s great sir!

I can’t wait to get back to the office routine, ghar pe baith ke khaate khaate aur mobile se laptop se TV screen alternate karte karte motulal ghotala ho gaya hu main. I miss formal shirts and pants and ties and coats already!! Abhi toh fit bhi nahi hoga!!!!

B: Arre waah bhai, teri isi hassi mazzaak ke liye to famous ho tum, humari team ko bhi thoda morale booster chahiye, you know, bahut din se koi R&R ya company party nahi hui hai, isiliye

Karte hain kuchh

AA: Bilkul sir, kaam ke saath thoda jaam bhi zaruri hai. App bolo sir , budget sanction ho gaya toh badiya party organize kar denge hum. 

B: Haan abhi toh kaam aur jaam eeksath chal raha hoga ghar pe !!!  kaam to chalta rahega, achha I am off on a trip this weekend . I'm going on a camping and fishing trip. Yaar naya 4 by 4 liya toh thoda test drive karne jaa rahe hain… 

Thoda busy rahunga main is weekend ko

Maine tumhe 5 project proposals bhej diye hain, inko monday tak zara finalize kar dena, fir hum client presentation ke upar focus karenge, theek hai?  

AA: Sir...Monday tak? Aaj Thursday hai sir.. aur sham bhi hogaya !! matlab ajj ka din toh gaya nah sir!!!

4X4 le ke ghoomne jaa rahe ho, tum karo to fishing and camping, hum kare to global warming?

ye CEO log ke liye koi alag carbon emission standard hota hai kya? achha achha, main samajh gaya, ye muh se itni zada gas nikaalte hain ki inke gaaaadi se nikalne ke liye koi gas hi nahi bachti 

Itni powerful gas ye chhodte hain, agar elon musk ke starship me isko power source do, to ek tanki me wo mars ke do chakkar laga dega, aur teesri baari ke liye bhi leftover gas bachi rehti

B: Arre bhaijaan work from home me kya time wime , weekend-sheekend, kar rahe ho!!   Appraisal time yaad rakhunga main tumhara contribution, ekdum top-class raise dunga tere ko

Haan sir, appraisal ke liye hi to ghis rahe hain, yehi difference hai naukar aur maalik me, naukar bolta hai, main ye kaam isse zada achha kar sakta hu, lekin kar nahi paata, aur maalik bolta hai main batata hu tujhe kya karna hai, tu mere liye ye kar aur main tere ko mahine ka paisa dunga

Bhai supply demand ki baat hai, bhaarat me itna talent hai ki a brain drain ke baad bhi abhi aur brain drain hone ke liye bachi hui hai, aur ab yaha zada maalik ban rahe hain us brain ke liye

ab batao bhai, brain ko tum kaise baandh ke rakhoge? simple - paise se! Paisa fek, tamasha dekh! Ab ye alag baat hai ki kuchh log internet pe free me hi tamasha kar rahe hote hain, logo ko hasaane ke liye, case in point being my collaborator on this little slice of life, utsav sapkota!

AA. Oh thank you sir, nobody is more generous than you sir, app mahaan ho, nek insaan ho, balki main to kehta hu ki aap purush hi nahi ho

B: MATLAB???

AA: Arre sir mahapurush ho, mahapurush! Aapki kahaniya har ghar me maa apne bacche ko sunati hai ki beti ya beta so jaa, nahi to boss tere inbox me thhoos thhoos ke kaam bhar dega aur sara credit khud le jayega…[Coming back to reality] Thanks for the opportunity to work more sir

B: Ye hui na baat… jab mann kare tab kar lena, koi 10 to 6 thode hi karna hai, hai ki nahi? Na traffic jhelna hai, na formals pehen ke aana hai, kyu? Sahi bol raha hu na main!!!???

AA: Haan sir, kabhi galat aaj tak bola hi nahi aapne, aapke muh se jo shabd nikalte hain wo direct wikipedia pe upload ho jaate hain, without references or context, kyunki you know everything there is to know about every topic not just on earth but in the universe sir

main to wait kar raha hu ki kab aapse office me mil ke aapke gyaan ke anmol ratan main in-person catch kar saku sir

B: Arre yaar ek baar office aana shuru ho jaoge fir sab normal ho jayega, pehle ki tarah breakfast break, lunch break, chai-coffee break, sutta break, sab lenge, tab tak kar lo bhai 

thoda kaam, jab mann kare tab karna, jab mann kare tab so jaana, kyu? Sahi bola nah meh??

AA: Haan ji sir bilkul sahi baat bol rahe ho aap hi to bhaagya vidhaata ho karta dharta ho humare param poojya praan-naath ho maharaj

B: LOL agli team meeting me to zeher failaane waale ho tum, mujhe lag raha hai, chalo monday ki shaam tak kar lena kaam, aur fir next month office party me hum takraenge jaam, yes?

AA: arre waah sir kya sher maara hai sir, aapki shayari ghalib aur pankaj udhas ko fail kar deti hai sir , aap agar qawwali gaa do to ustad nusrat fateh ali khan jannat se dharti pe aa jaaye aapke liye 

B: Okay then, let’s talk on Monday evening, take care

AA: yes sir, alright sir, looking forward to it sir 

[after call ends] “take care toh karna padega hee apna…dimaag ka dahi bana diya chomu ne!

[phone rings, answers] yo sappy bro, wazzaaa? Arre weekend ki batti lag gayi yaar, ees work from home ne toh professional life ke personal life ko acquire kar liya hai, wo bhi saste me kharid diya mereko … Bilkul hostile takeover kardiya .. 

Fren: bhai kya huwa.??

AA..: Cricket ke target score ki jagah ab sales ke target chase down karne pad rahe hain aur boss power play khel raha hai

Football ke goals score karne ke bajaye quarterly goals ke peechhe bhaag rahe hain yeh jantey huwe kee championship aur ladki dono koi aur corporate ghissand ka andaa le jayega!!!! 

Fren:- arey bhai bol kya raha tu. Side meh koi hai kya ??

AA:  Side-wide front-shront sab jagah sirf kaam hai bhai

Saans aise fool rahi hai jaise corporate ladder raaftaar ke gaane ki speed se climb kar rahe ho.. bass kabbaddi khel rahe hain asal meh banki naamuraad soul-dead machine-learners se !!! 

Main to bolta hu robot kya replace karenge workers ko, ye to abhi se hi robot hain bhai, jab robot inko replace karne ayenge to ye unka bhoot bana denge 24 X 7 X 365 kaam kar kar ke

Anyway tu bata bhai kya chal raha hai, apna instagram badhane ke liye kaha ghoomne ja rahe ho third wave failaane?

FRIEND: bhai jaha bhi jaa raha hu laptop saath le ke jaa raha hu, work from anywhere hai na!